PUBLISHER'S DISCLAIMER:

                   Inevitable Doom Press hereby warns all readers of the possibility of

                   insanity or violent death resulting from the reading of these verses.

                   You may also suffer headaches, halitosis, hoof-and-mouth disease,

                   dizziness, failure to achieve dizziness when dizziness is desired,

                   bleeding from hair follicles, the unexplained cancellation of

                   subscriptions that are dear to you, hives, rashes, boils, inflamed

                   earlobes, the sudden growth of a second head, bad weather, colossal

                   flatulence, the compulsion to insist that your name is Igor when you

                   know perfectly well this isn't true, the unwanted romantic attention

                   of cats, blisters, and the growth of eye hair.